I was eating out this girl yesterday and when I finished, she asked me if I wanted to take any home with me. She was serious, dude!
What does that even mean?
Just shaved my legs with toilet water in a walgreens bathroom. I am so classy.
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
For the love of God you used a 40 foot extension cord to bungee jump out the off the 2 nd floor
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I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
He tried to take a picture of me naked but only got my ass. I don't know his name but if my butt is a guys wallpaper, that's the one I boned.
And then he said he would build me a mountain dew water fountain
Marry him now.
Want to go swimsuit shopping? First one who cries buys ice cream.
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You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
I don't know if the puke on my pants is mine or not
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
His balls will have been in my mouth at least once by this time tomorrow.
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
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