id be glad to
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
On the bright side I got 500 American Express points paying for the abortion
she was wide awake when they drew a treasure map on her face the she passed out and they played like 7 games of tic tac toe haaa how was your new years
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
Have you seen Dave? He's not on top of the bar anymore but I found his shirt.
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
it says 'tasty bitch' in sharpie on my tits...
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
Best case scenario you died and I melt into poo
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
You should of known that i was high if i refer to myself as melting into anything
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
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