I just named my vagina "The Boneyard"
More like "Chia Pet"
how can i change my meal plan to a keystone plan?
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
Her bed is on wheels, so we woke up in the kitchen.
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
Sometimes crazy just comes naturally. I don't need booze to say that on occasion I feel the need to rip off my asshole and throw it against the fridge to see if it sticks.
Ps we ordered a pizza at the pool today and I dropped the entire thing in the pool. We still ate it. #canthang
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
By NOT going to the gym, I'm helping my future. I don't want stripping, prostitution, or porn to be viable money making options.
Am I just high or is she having an auction for her vagina on Twitter
Yeah you're weird. You once told me you would by me a house in the middle of sex. Like as you were thrusting.
I'm a terrible person when I drink. I went from fine to not making any sense and yelling about cheese in like 30 seconds.
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
Randomize