Drinking non-alcoholic beer is like going down on your cousin.
Sure it tastes the same, but it ain't right.
You were doing downward dog and puking off my deck at the same time.
It's only slutty when someone else does it. It's okay if it's us though
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
I can feel your judgement through the phone
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
Also, I had mind-blowing sex on a pool table
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize