oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
all 3 of us brought blondes home last night. all 3 are passed out. we're gonna switch rooms and see how long until one of them notices.
obviously my window is still shattered. they're pressure washing my condo today. i think i need a bloody mary.
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
As soon as I got there, you appeared out of no where, yelled "they're giving away free cigarettes!" in my face and then disappeared and I didn't see you the rest of the night.
I want to but I can't have a boner while doing a install and working with a customer
Apparently I blamed my BAC on the Saint Louis Cardinals...how is that not a valid excuse?!
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
Just letting you know that I just spent 11 dollars on a car wash... Because you had sex in my car.
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
not only did he puke in his mouth and hold it.. He also sneezed while doing this
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize
