why am i having a flashback about somewhere we were this weekend with music videos playing? Spike jonze brothers place?? Help me out
so the guy behind me in court for my DUI hearing got a DUI on a lawnmower at 1AM...he is my new hero
We have to go find her fucking car. She came home from a 80 dollar cab ride, no shoes, and all she remembers is its at a burger king on a street with an H in it
Who spends 33 dollars at Taco Bell and lives???
And the cops told us we were all naked.
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
I peed my pants walking home last night... I just kept walking.
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
Such a big mess for such a small penis
Just remember I’m your roommate with extremely questionable morals
Exactly, what could possibly go wrong
Randomize
