Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
the bouncer kept askin you for id just to see how long it would take you to find your pants
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
Not much, just your average college male Sunday cleaning period blood out of the carpet.
Tell me you're kidding.
Besides scarred, I'm not much of anything right now.
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
I tried to sit on a barstool last night...it was an open trashcan.
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
diet's not working. come over. i need someone to fuck the hungry out of me.
Sleeping with random people is the same as soul searching, right? Ps that wasn't a team name suggestion.
And by pregame I mean drink heavily and watch Russian dash cam car crash vids
When you put the phrases "just out of shower" and "did you get the picture" that close together, a picture of hamburger helper is not exactly what I expected to pop up.
when I called the strip club they said there was a note with my credit card. "girl who punched guy in throat" fuck daytona
I don't remember his name. I had whataburger on my mind and in my hands so I wasnt really listening
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
I had to cum in my sink.
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