remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
As I climbed in the bathroom window from the room I noticed both him rommates staring and talking about me in the hall...
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
Just put me in your contacts as coyote
I have 13 missed calls from when I slept outside on some rocks
I got bit by a peacock. That's how hard shit went down last night.
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
You faceplanted on the railroad tracks and when I tried to tell you to get up, you told me you were "taking a quick breather"
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
he came with me to get plan b but they didn't have any. when I started crying he said "come on it's not that bad.. ill go get sandwiches from the vending machine and we'll have our first meal together as a family"
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