Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
did i call you last night crying about tacos and the royal wedding again?
Went to anytime fitness at 3:34 am drunk after the the bar and getting whataburger. Lifted weights with my cheeseburger between my knees. That's called DEDICATION.
she chugged a bowl of salsa and then gave my ferret weight loss tips. she's like my fucking spirit animal now
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
You kept trying to use my cat as a napkin.
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
I got really upset at the McDonald's worker. They should serve nuggets 24/7. Apparently 5am is breakfast for some people.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
I asked for a cup of water. They gave me tequila. They WANT ME TO DIE
So, I ran into Garrett last night in the laundry room.
Oh really? First post break-up run in. How'd it go? Awkward?
Um. We had sex on a washing machine.
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize
