Of course im so fucked up sarah. I fight away tornadoes.
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
I woke up with my wool blanket soaking wet on the dorm room floor, and my sweatshirt hanging on the shower door down the hall. So basically my camp-out-in-the-bathroom idea didn't turn out as planned
Leave it to me and my dad to puke on the same guy at the same bar 25 years apart
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
After pissing all over her van its a lot easier to look her in the eye than I thought.
I just called my grandma crying, apologizing for being the first grandchild to have premarital sex...I'm either about to start my period or pregnant.
Can I come kidnap you from work so we can chug mimosas? My little brother has a ski mask I can borrow.
In hindsight, maybe rearranging his living room because he has OCD while he was out wasnt the greatest idea. Though it'll keep him busy for HOURS
Randomize
