Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
well you can't waste a boner
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
We were hooking up and you crawled into bed with us, because you had lost your phone and didn't "want to be alone at a time like this."
Hopefully. Play it cool. Bust out a few jokes. Chew with your mouth closed and show your boobs.
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
You're fine
I'm hiding in my chest because my walls smell weird. I'm not fine.
Couldn't find any balloons, so we're doing whippets out of condoms. Being a ho has its benefits.
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
Just realized I'm going to have to make you sign a non-disclosure agreement before my wedding.
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
Do thigh high boots and a ball gag count as a costume?
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