What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
so you masturbated because Oprah told you?
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
she wouldn't play beer pong with me unless I took off the rollerskates.
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
I WILL MAKE A FLYING LEAP FOR YOUR DICK WHEN I SEE YOU THROUGH THE WINDOW
His name is Angel. I'm pretty sure he was sent from heaven solely to eat me out.
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
You called your ex, and talked to her for an hour about how you miss her, came back inside and asked the girl with the biggest tits if you could take a pic with your face in them and sent her the picture.
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
We spent our last night together taking turns vomiting in the bathroom. I'd say it was a romantic trip.
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
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