Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
please dont make me drink to the titanic soundtrack
Just saw the guy with the plastic bag on his head riding his bike again...
I was just handed a bible on my walk of shame....are you there god? its tequila tuesday's hangover
Ok. So let me get this straight. She treats her vagina like a clown car, yet judges me for just making out with the guy that bought all of us shots?
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
So I'm just casually at the grocery store when I remember that there's still a clove of garlic in my vagina
Well, I wish you luck on finding out who your boyfriend is
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
Also my roomates are going to be gone till sunday. Make correct decision here
Quit calling your parents your roomates
doc says my ankle might be broken, they're going to do xrays. He asked me what happened and I told him if he could find out that would be great.
Randomize
