You litterally reached into some girls shirt, pulled out her tit and yelled whats up with this guy.
Found her laying down in a booth in iHop. She's a keeper.
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
I just want to hug my vagina but I can't!\nLike, I want to wrap my arms around it and say "I'm sorry"
I cNt phones. tingles in my fingles. jingles
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
You know the rule about how you feel bad for getting food and not offering other people you're around, does that apply when you eat burger king at a strip club?
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
You know something is wrong with your lifestyle when you have to clean easy Mac cheese powder off of your scale
at least it's not cocaine like last time
Randomize
