I miss you like a fat girl misses the prom.
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
Its a good thing the lights were off cuz Im pretty sure the look on my face when I touched his penis would have offended him
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
Guess which guy you've blown just made me sandwich at subway?
just found glitter in my belly button...seriously when will this nightmare end
1 month til my stepdad becomes a u.s. citizen, so if you want to get in on the divorce pool its your last chance, $5 a square.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
Yeah I went home with her... She had me take off everything but my shirt and from across the room goes, "Now dance. Just dance that dick over here"
Which president had the biggest dick?
Take your time, I'll wait
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
Are you still passed out in my back seat, or do I need to come find you?
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