I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
still doesn't change the fact you were dunking your sock in the toilet.
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
Peanut butter while high is kinda stressful
ive got a scarf tied around my face holding bags of hashbrowns to it, im too boss to care
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
Went to my bottom drawer for my stash , gone just a note says thanks sucker love dad
i found 4 slices of pizza in my toaster, and a can of unopened soup in my blender.. wtf?
I did crash a prom last night though.. It was fun
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
Randomize
