He locked about 20 beers in a suitcase and put it in the fridge. For a complete idiot, he's a goddamn genius.
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
I've hooked up with 3 different guys already this week...don't tell me I haven't been a productive member of society
Apparently I kept telling people I was a pro tennis player again...
I literally saw him try to open a beer can with his anus. We need o step up our game.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
Not rlly sure. Might just drink and sleep. Gotta wake up for my last rabies shot lol
Does hooking up with the gay pledge count as hazing?
So to distract myself from jackies vomiting, im making up a story in my head. It's called the little penis that could
He said it. He actually said "yes it's in".
As your attorney I advise you to rage rapidly
Whatever, you're gonna have to break it to mom that the reason I was so drunk at Christmas dinner is because she wouldn't stop asking me why I don't have a boyfriend
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
just bought safety googles to wear so he can cum on my face and not in my eye. SAFETY FIRST!
Randomize
