Dude, I just woke up on the floor of some random chick's floor with puke in my hair and a posted note on my forehead that said "It's over." Dude I wasn't even aware I was in a relationship...
I want to make a zoo with you.
dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
This random guy just introduced himself then said "So, I am staying at my friends place and he has a 4 year old, so we should probably go back to your house." WTF kind of vibes do I give off?
Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
Normal vaginal pH: 3.8 to 4.5. Of course it tastes like a 9-volt. I could run a potato clock on that thing.
My text message history should be ashamed of itself right now.
Kyle's mobile fuck service..... Kinda has a nice ring to it don't you think??
P.S. I just made up pleasure scepter for the purpose of that last message.
If I got to choose how I die, it would be in an Olympic sized pool of gin and tonic.
I'm just blindly tossing my dick into whatever comes my way.
Who brings a stripper home to ninja turtle bed sheets
Me and I got head
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
It's a shame things ended how they did. We were well on our way to transforming from acquaintances with benefits to friends with benefits.
i'm not sure what you are doing right now, but i know that i don't like it. whatever you are doing. just stop. come here so we can fuck
Randomize
