As gay men are we obligated to learn the Single Ladies dance.
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
Remember how we use to say "this will be the year I'll get my shit together!" And like we stopped doing that because we know that isn't happening anytime soon.
According to my Fitbit I was passed out in my car for 2 hours after she got us kicked out of the bar
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
He lives in a tent in my ex'd backyard. Why the fuck would you want any of that dirty dick?
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
Randomize
