you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
She challenged me to a game of rock-paper-scissors for her virginity. I love this girl.
That's ok. Our relationship has a solid foundation of booze and questionable behavior.
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
Just so you know, I'm standing in my bra eating cereal. My keys were in the cereal box.
Are my feet made of real feet?
Nobody knew what to do when it was dead. You said fire up the George Foreman, I've never ate baby shark. She hasn't stopped crying.
Just did a drug deal on the toy aisle at walmart, Merry Christmas
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
No, and she still hasn't answered me...I get a whole series of text messages about Guatemalan anal bleaching but no fucking answer to my question.
Ya know, one would think a restraining order would keep me from fucking my ex.
It's a classy one I promise! Their toilets are cushioned an tier wifi is named hummingbird
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize
