Whssdazt areerg yiu up to? U thijk ur lame!
read your last text- its a foreign language-im not ignoring you, easyyy
Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
What's the protocol on showing a video of me sucking the life out of my ex in order to prove beyond a doubt that I give great head???
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
i'll just tell him I slept with them both because we needed to compare notes
Dude. The only thing that I use less than my dick is my tennis racket. We need to play.
Oh god I just realized bird face had che Guevara tattooed on her upper arm. Deals off, readivised opinion
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
Side note: Hot guys are now getting with ugly chicks. Alert the media.
I think your husband is breaking up with me...
What I'm doing now is like me taking a bagel, dropping it butter side down, leaving it for six years, picking it back up, and trying to fuck it
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
Randomize
