i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
There are two types of people in this world I don't trust: people who collect stamps, and people who don't drink
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
Bro, you're like, my right testicle. Can't go anywhere without you.
Look, sometimes you have to snapchat a topless photo of yourself in the middle of class just to prove you can. I can and I did. End of argument.
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
Just please try not to piss Danny off, I really can't afford to find a new drug dealer again
my extended weekend of being as irresponsible as possible started with blowing the bartender in the bar bathroom. off to a good start.
All i remember from last night was that i was sitting on the toilet for a good hour eating a philly cheesesteak hotpocket... then i woke up... in my bed.
Randomize
