He quoted an N'sync song to confess his attraction to me. Needless to say, I had sex with him.
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
Just had a guy dressed only in a towel ask me for a cig, hug me and kiss me then proceeded to pee of the balcony while still talking to me and callin me baby
There's a skateboard on the patio and all the chips are gone. The note on the fridge says 'don't buy cheese'. Stop letting her go outside.
I'd be there a lot sooner if these damn stairs would stop moving.
I'd say you were a shitshow. Playing floating beer pong in the pool you kept filling other people's cups with pool water and laughing to yourself.
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
When you went off to sleep with that guy that looked like a dirty Jesus and I asked why all you had to say "trying to keep Christ in Christmas" and left. The Vatican called, you're going to Hell.
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
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