Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
Kay wants to put chicklets in our cooters to make beavers and take pix captioned Got Wood? Taking public transit does scary things to her.
he's having a long distance Facebook-coordinated power hour. the status update has 159 comments ...
Mom's drinking. Just asked her if she was good to walk back to the condo. She seemed unsure until she remembered she brought the GPS. We are 2 blocks from the condo.
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
I'm pretty sure "tag teaming" and "looking for stability" are not synonymous.
Not yet.
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
I just read my D.A.R.E. essay from 5th grade. I'm having mixed feelings about my previous life choices right now.
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
I need to bang the neighbor boy. He’s given three women screaming orgasms this week alone.
Also, my apartment walls are too thin
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