we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class?
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
The chips are stabbing my teeth, and I can feel the muscle under my mouth contracting.
We HAVE another bedroom, it's not like I was gunna chain you into the closet. Often.
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
That moment that random you banged behind the bar is going to be your son's third grade teacher... yup I'm there.
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
You were having sex very loudly, so I felt it necessary to blast the Thong Song, bust out the trusty old airhorn and walk in on you. MY BAD.
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
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