So ignoring my calls doesnt work if you update your facebook a minute later.
I just passed one of the bars and saw my mom kissing another woman. This can't be good....right?
Knowing your life, probably not.
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
i came out of my blackout when my grandma called last night. it kinda sobered me up and i realized who i had been making out with. should i call and thank her for the defensive cockblock?
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
"lets watch the sunrise" turned into "lets have sex on the roof at six thirty in the morning"
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
Come get me...we were walking home and she kept yelling "people need to get run over more!" then she just sat down in the middle of the street saying "it just feels right."
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
Oh and I'm kind of in the library.
Waiting for the foreign guy who keeps staring to make his creepy move.
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
A stoners worse nightmare? Well packaged snacks. Just took me 5 mins to get a cinnamon roll out of the package. And another 3 mins to properly type this text
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
Randomize
