After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
We agreed to not shave eyebrows when someone is passed out. douchebag.
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
You know it's been a successful day when the only reason you put on a bra was to take off your shirt
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
So I sniffed too hard this morning before work and I THINK THE COCAINE JUST STARTED ROUND 2.
Should I bring my 4 pairs of bunny ears? Or is that too weird?
4 pairs might be a bit much
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