I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
she looked like the before picture.
bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
Im sick of reading dumb tattoos while having sex
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
Highlight of the week: I had sex with a B movie star wearing an eye patch.
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
Probably yeah. I mean maybe one day we can be those friends that hang out naked. Not awkard at all.
Your skill with memes is vaguely frightening
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
I don't know how it started but we all ended up shirtless andI was covered in crawfish and wearing a sombrero.
Randomize
