You hurt me so bad and it feels so good
You're perfectly engineered for doggy style
First off, get on bc solely in preperation for this event. Second, as my little sister you have a lot of whore to live up to.
Tough to be a good wingman when you puke on yourself and everyone w/in a 5 ft radius at the FIRST bar we go to so don't tell me to step my game up
That chick went from zero to shitshow in only 6 shots.
So apparently using the emergency exit of the bar as a bathroom is frowned upon in this establishment...
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
I just need some dick and some jimmy johns
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
I thought he was foreign, but it turns out when you're that drunk, an Ohio accent just sounds Russian.
dont know if she was trying to start a lawnmower or jerk me off. still wasnt to bad though
I went to the hospital to have my arm checked out, and they already knew the story. They gave me props for posting photos on facebook before even coming to the hospital.
Idk if my headache is from the alcohol, the pot brownies, or being dragged down 8 flights of stairs by my ankles because i passed out in the 12th floor girls bathroom by you. Probably a combo of all three.
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
Randomize
