how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
my dad brought home flowers.. so i started talking to them
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
I don't get it. Why have babies when you can have vodka?
god dammit I AM NO LONGER PUTTING UP WITH YOUR HETEROSEXUALITY I QUIT
I think pants incapable of making pants work
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
Randomize
