i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
he was humming party in the usa while we were having sex.
This is worse than the time I broke into Subway to steal bread.
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
im really going to miss that car, so many blow jobs...
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
I just found a weed leaf in my leg hair..
I fell in the river last night. The allegheny to be exact. Omg getting drunk at work gatherings is dangerous
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
THERE IS WATER LITERALLY DRIPPING OFF OF THE CHANDELIER. I OFFICIALLY HAVE THE WORLD'S WORST RAINFALL SHOWER HEAD.
Randomize
