i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
someone took a shit in my car last night and left $5 on the seat...
I plan on putting pajamas back on after I shower. Today is going to be awesome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
next time dont tell jokes :) miss bonerkill
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
The kids I taught this morning even knew i was drunk. One of them even said, and I quote, "You smell like my dad after he goes bowling."
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
is pulling out brownies in the middle of class on 4/20 just too obvious?
I may have played more drinking games with my family this last week than all of freshman year...
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
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