lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
She finally woke up and said, "Me- nothing, potato peeler- 1." And rolled back over.
i need to find a notary that isn't going to turn me in for blatantly lying to the us and chilean governments
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
I had a sex dream. With two guys. And my subconscious decided to put your dick on BOTH OF THEM. If there is a society where that does not mean "I cherish you" I do not want to live there.
You're doing a terrible job of letting me hook up with girls vicariously through you.
She must've been waiting down the street cause after I said I specialized in inner-thigh-face-massage it couldn't have been 2 minutes until she was on my couch.
So a guy died and our dates revived him with CPR. Good night?
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
I don't think I have face palmed that many times in such a short period. And I've worked tech support.
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
Yeah, he fractured his ass by doing a canon ball into the bath tub....
There way too many people in that club who have had their dick in me
Randomize
