Dude, no joke... I lost my wedding ring in some skank last night
I love watching others lives come down to our level.
he is the anna nicole to my 90 year-old billionaire. i'm grateful that he's fucking me, so i'm buying him shit.
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
Get this. Chipped my front tooth taking a sip of a gay mans beer out of my cleavage. Fuck my fucking life. that'll be fun to explain to my dentist
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
Btw he dated my mom. You're Eskimo siblings with my mom. Good job.
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
Like I'm getting finger banged and my family is making cookies in the kitchen. Talk about terrifying
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
Randomize
