So i had sex for a couple seconds last night
just won a stolen shopping cart in a dance off in a parking lot.
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
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We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
Just found out my mom tried to sue the birth control company when she got pregnant with me...love you too mom.
You asked my mom "who the fuck drives four hours to sleep in a guys bed and not touch his penis"
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Were at her birthday dinner and her dad keeps buying me shots saying when I was your age I fucked the shit outta girls
Hahahahahaha remind him your dating his daughter
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
Dude I broke her toilet blowing some dude. I wasn't going to turn down the 300$ he offered to fix it.
You got banned for life from a $30 a night motel. What are you doing with your life?
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
I feel like him using the excuse "I'm not a fan of lying" to stop me from sleeping around is hypocritical since he's cheating on his wife with me.
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