I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
Shes in the fridge organizing my beer collection. I love having a girlfriend with OCD
it was like brushing your tongue but with a fucking long toothbrush.
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
it's ok. you also told me I can feel free to vomit on your blow dryer sometime.
As I was brushing his cum out of my hair he looks at me and says "it happens to me all the time."
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
There's s woman at the corner of the bar dancing by herself in her seat and making eye contact with me. Please hurry.
I met a pornstar at his bachelor party and signed his shirt giving him wedding advice
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
We need to move to a different bar soon. When we're standing on the patio, and every guy around us has seen us naked...there's a problem
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
Randomize
