Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
I don't know how to tell my mom that I'm not sober enough to drive to the dentist...
theres always time to masturbate. my grandpa taught me that.
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
Oh and jess is gonna pee in our guest bedroom to mark her territory.
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
PROFESSOR JUST TOOK A SHOT WITH US BEFORE CLASS. WELCOME TO THE LAST DAY OF FINALS.
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
moral of my life: don't tell a guy you want to have sex with him. he'll get back together with his ex.
After we had sex he went to the kitchen, came back with a bag of funyuns and ate them buck ass naked in his bedroom doorway. Had no idea how to react to that one.
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
Randomize
