His vagina is bleeding blood all over the court
just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
Everytime she would start slurring, she'd stop, hold up a finger, wait like 30 seconds, then try again. I love drunk people
This girl I work with, who is 18 btw, invited me to her baby shower. Do they sell abortions in gift certificate form?
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
So from the residue on my balls I think it was mashed potatoes she had in her mouth
but i'm paying and its not a date cause he's got a gf and i'm hooking up with his roommate tomorrow night
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
I got inside last night via doggy door
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
I'm deleting Tinder. I got there he rubbed my back and then proceeded to jerk off on me.
Just let me pee on you and I'll leave you alone.
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
Randomize
