toast her oven
toast her strudel
inspect her gadget
I just walked into a tree. I think it's time to go home.
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
her boyfriend dumped her for my exgirlfriend. so filming our hookup is pretty much a definite.
Dude. The girls called me over to see what they had in their dorm. They snuck in a pigeon in a cardboard box. They named it Quincey. They swear they're sober.
Is this helping you get pumped up or am I going to have to send you more dick pics?
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
You never know how much you love your bed until you sleep with 4 other people in your car.
Well, I convinced myself I had a sixth toe and then I ripped it off. So I PRAY you're doing better than me.
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
I stared at him for a solid five minutes because he looked like what I imagine god would look like if god was a lumberjack
He's completely obsessed with his ex but gives phenomenal head. So overall, yeah, good first date.
I think I should've done my makeup before I took the acid. Because now I just feel silly looking at myself in the mirror
He got mad at you last time bc you tried to rap battle him via text. This is strictly business.
Randomize
