bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
When I asked if she spit or swallow she replied "I never learned how to spit"
I just went to a subway where the girl didn't know how to make a blt. I will not miss public school texans.
She set an alarm on my phone for her birthday. Place: Her bed.
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
Explain it like you would if you were talking to a 5 yo
Wait no, like you would to a stoned high school freshman.
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
Sorry this is taking so long. I'm looking for my dignity.
I showed up drunk and covered in glitter, smelling like stale booze and dirty stripper and my younger brother gave thanks his life wasn’t a shitshow like mine
That’s how my thanksgiving went
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