life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
You were directing traffic around her for 30min after she passed out in the middle of the road.
You really are best friends.
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
his profile picture is him throwing up "#1" hands after his lax championship next to his coach that i fucked....embarrasing for him, yet ironically beautiful for me.
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
dude he was laying on two half-naked chicks, as they rubbed him down with lotion, while rolling a joint. hes like a modern-day african king
When I realised he had a girlfriend I just started telling them about my ex and how I write poetry about him. Which I then read to them. They just gave me pity looks and left me to finish my spliff alone.
Got home last night and found a Big Mac in the shower, tampons all over the place, and two pairs of your panties on the front porch.
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
Apparently this is my life now. Fucking men in their 30s with small dogs.
Why are there jello shots in the kitchen drawer?
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
"Plot twist... I'm straight."
Nothing ruins your day more than waking up to you dogs crotch in your face
Randomize
