it doesn't get any better than taco bell and soft core porn
I looked at my own cervix.
puked in the new hous. now it's officially home.
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
Thanks for not stopping me when I decided to call my mom at 2 in the morning to ask her where I was born
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
I'm not sure what step "make amends" is, but my phone is on
you fail at everything in life besides blacking out
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
Yeah she's a complete bitch. But I mostly hate her because she hijacked my fuck buddy.
Basically all I do anymore is get stoned with my cats, and then we share goldfish.
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
We were dancing and then he pointed to the club floor and there was money that I dropped everywhere. That was the nicest thing someone has ever done for me.
Randomize