weddingsv make me drug and hornr
He seems like he has feelings, which is completely unacceptable; esp for a boy in college.
We smoked a joint and talked about his parent's divorce. It was like being fifteen all over again.
I woke up hugging a loaf of bread and a water bottle this morning
My face left an imprint in the loaf...
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
WHAT DO YOU MEAN I DIDN'T APOLOGIZE? THERE WAS A PEACE OFFERING MADE VIA TACO BELL.
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
Just found a pack of birth control on the corner of Oakland and Thomas, so if your desperate its up for grabs.
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
This weekend was amazing, 4 confirmed pukings, 2 cops, 3 hookers, one photographed t-bagging of the groom, and a night in an illegal gambling house.
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
Randomize
