Boner jamz table deep. plus bar deep. wiing waing.
I'm at derby!
The kentucky derby! But its night time, theres no way the horses are awake at this time.
Sorry i'm not sorry i made out with your dad. It was father's day weekend, get a grip
Maybe someone other than the mad hatter should have gone with him to the ER
I woke up to her screaming at the various pictures of nutsacks she found on her camera
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
This is like the best thing that's ever happened to us. We're getting paid to sit around get high and eat. There is a Jesus
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
Just remembered when I first started going down on him he goes "ok now I feel a little better about the broncos losing"
My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
Drunk assassins creed leads to explaining to my father that "it was only a steak knife in the arm"
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
She flashed us last time and pissed all over the floor this time. I'm scared to invite her back.
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
Randomize
