Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
Apparently oprah and I were in competition to see who's ass could get bigger this summer
Pre-order weed for 4/20 and i'll give you a discount.
Well, as a member of the greater american southwest gay community I just have to mark this as a total loss and you will be missed.
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
where will you be at 9:30 tonight?
piledriving you in your roommate's bed?
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
I deserve to have sex with a hot freshman ok
Is it just me or is it like a girl gets married and all of a sudden she’s a “blogger”?
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
Ahhh, beer. My second favorite breakfast drink.
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