Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
She seriously needs to find another hobby other than bouncing on cock.
Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
How was the party last night?
I'm dangerously close to shitting myself.
i think god would be more upset with me for turning down such a beautifully crafted cock than he would for me liking girls
Either I think of sex like a man, or all the men in Vegas are women.
It started with a wedding, followed by a drag show, and ended with Trevor getting punched in the face by the bouncer. How was your weekend?
I had a dream that my roommate walked in on me masturbating and I hissed "I'm not stopping this orgasm train for the likes of you" and just kept going
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
Dude, you were so drunk you were hanging from the ceiling of my car pretending you were a sloth while we were on 81.
Bad part of last night: I puked in my hair. Good part of last night: I assembled a posse.
You kept pulling me aside saying "look what I found"
Randomize
