smoked weed with Joakim Noah last night....if he was half as fast to the basket as he is to grab a joint from me we'd have another championship on our hands
his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
I just compared drinking to love. How do these people not know I'm an alcoholic?
I think my multiple attempts of taking his life, no matter how unintentional they were, has put a damper on our friendship
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
No, no... It was great. I feel like my liver took a vodka shower and washed it's hair with pabst
You know the story of the boner party, right? They got stuck in the mountains and ate each other?
It was the Donner party... boner party was the porn version...
Randomize
