Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
Dude.. I don’t care how hairy she is, you already left me at the bar, and now I have to find another fucking way home... NOW BE A MAN ABOUT IT!
Steve is enlightening me on how and why u put gerbils up your ass
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
When he left he said something to the effect of "well now that I've been used..." I think he may be on to me.
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
This is not a costume party, I'm just wearing fairy wings.
Of course you are.
the bandages come off on Tuesday. we can try out my new breasts then.
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
Yes but I said "let's get a dog" not a drunk human so some rules will be established this evening
I'm still drunk dear. I just woke up 3 feet from the front door with 20 dollars worth of taco bell in my hands.
Other than the whole stab wound in my leg thing, today was pretty good. The nurses all loved me and gave me a sandwich and juice.
Randomize
