I bought a boat. Want to have sex on The Angry Clam? That's what I named it.
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
The bloodstain in the garden looks like a sad face. Like I don't already know this is bad...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
You said that we all need to "head out like a boner through sweatpants and get fucked." Jager night was a success.
He's living a porn movie. He's slept with a waitress at her work for lunch, a bar tender at the bar that night, and the cleaning lady the next morning.
Don't ever feel guilty about what you put in your mouth best advice my gma ever gave me lmao
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
Oh dude I know. When something that's supposed stop pregnancies taste like chocolate something's up
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
Times have changed. Freshman year I could throw my shirt in a bonfire and still get laid. Now when I puke in my girlfriend's bed on her birthday I'm "an asshole"
Also I've accepted I am not going to be a catch today. I look like a dead hooker and the remedial work is going to be patchy at best with the shakes I've got.
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
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