Homeslice needs to figure out he's so 2006
I'm having one of those days where I just want to lay in bed and beat off all day
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
the saddest part is, this is not even the first time i've woken up in a shopping cart with a concussion.
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
Thanks for bringing me tea/a bucket. You have earned yourself a face touch.
You blew him?!?!
*Am blowing
And I keep taking breaks to write you back, please stop replying.
Fuck baseball, getting drunk and playing with kittens is the REAL national pasttime
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
Randomize
