census says that i am hotter than the girl you just left with...sad for you
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
I'm on my fifth cocktail in twenty minutes. I don't think I will end this on two legs.
The guy next to me in the library just got a call from his roommate asking him to come bail him out of jail...we need to step up our game.
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
Let's be honest, I am pretty sketchy looking.
All you need is a handful of lube and an open mind
I have one goal now that I am in the USA. To find a man I can fuck into marriage before my visa runs out.
I hope a pyrotechnic goes off in your asshole and seals it shut for life.
Me too.
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
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